Of some boredness.

Boredom kicks in easily. Here are some suggestions to take the dullness away:

Blinking lights are uberly everywhere. Say you’re in an elevator and the fluorescent light is blinking. Just stand below the lights and dance ala-rave. Dancing with a friend is suggested.

Sometimes, the crowd gets rowdy when the event hasn’t started yet. Stand in the middle and tell everyone to do an impromptu wave. Doing this after a match inside a cockfight dome is suggested.

A dancing traffic officer is cute. Make it cuter by joining in and create choreographed steps. Use your cell phones to create blinking lights during dance time, suggested when dancing is done at nights.

It doesn’t hurt if you salute a security guard. Be sure to salute in groups and be ready if there’s a real soldier around. They might kick your ass.

When you’re buying in a store and the items consist of three or more, be sure to add an “A! A! A!” ala Count of Sesame Street. You can also use this with 1 item only, but where is the fun in that?

Take a picture of a girl and a boy that is seating beside each other and say “Yihii!” Be sure that they don’t know each other and be aware that they might kick your ass. So choose victims wisely.

Climbing stairs is close to a workout. Remember a scene in the Sound of Music where they’re singing Do-re-mi while climbing the stairs? You can copy that one, suggested number of people doing the crap: seven.

–=+=–

I ran out of ideas so how about us trying to create an everlasting candle. So, what is an everlasting candle? Well, there’s no such thing as everlasting. We just want to extend the life of an object’s purpose. Like our armpits, its sole purpose is to create a fart-ing sound whenever we place our palms while we’re flapping our arms. The wetter the betterer.

What do we need? A candle made of wax (earwax! Bwahahaha. This is not really funny. Really) preferably those made (again) in the province. Let’s be specific, the one’s made in Dolores, Quezon. Remember this part. You need a candle made in Dolores. It doesn’t cost you much though, you just need a (meaning: one) candle.

Now, you need to place that candle on those candle stands that are made in steel. The one’s used in those big churches. Those painted in black. Nope, not that one. They were just affected by the black smoke of the candles. We need black. Yup, that one. I knew you’ll get it. You lucky you.

Now, light the candle. Make sure it stands on the mic stand err candle stand. Then wait for the candle to melt or just make sure that there’s a pool of liquefied hot wax that is swimming in the candle stand. Then spit on it. Make sure your spit should somehow mix with the wax.

It doesn’t work the first time you do it. You have to do it a number of times before you could successfully create burning wax.

(we’ve done this when we were kids while we were vacationing in, where else, Dolores. And yes, I stayed in the area of the church but that’s another story.)

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~ by targrod on September 10, 2008.

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