:: parents and kids ::

I know it is kind of awkward, inappropriate even, to say things about child-bearing, child psychology, and child rearing. Obviously, since I am not yet a parent, only a godparent and a lover of parent folders in my computer. So, I immediately did the next best thing. I asked my mother.

There might be bias to all the things that I am going to say in this post.

I asked my mom if she was ready to be a parent when she got pregnant 20+ ehem 30+ years ago. She immediately told me that they, including my father, were waiting for me in full gusto and excitement. I can somehow attest to that. I mean she practically sacrificed her personal life for me.

And that is my first theory, is unwanted pregnancy or unprepared parents play a big factor in why kids are extra needy nowadays.

I think they are everywhere. The parents themselves would not accept the fact that it is happening. It could be denial since the old adage of a child being hyper is as usual as gas prices going up every week. Or are they just too lazy to discipline their own children? But seriously, how hard is it to do discipline a child?

If you can be totally upright to your friends, family, and office-mates in saying no to most cases, it would / must be easier to a child, your child. And you, as a parent, are responsible for the growth of someone who would probably be the next president of this country or the next great president of a company of condoms.

In which, I asked my mother again on at what age was I first disciplined. One year old is the answer. She followed it up with just making me feel of the things that I was denied with. It did not matter if I did not understand her words coherently. As long as she gave me reasons and understanding on why an item or a request is denied to the point where I would feel it.

I am surprised with the few people around me who cannot control their kids (pardon this post my friends, I am actually concerned with what is happening to your lives right now). The greatest comment my mom said was that parents should not be controlled by their kids.

Example: A child wants to drink coke but you know that the kid drank two glasses of cola already. A supposed nice parent would still oblige while a disciplinarian would say otherwise. And if the supposed nice parent says no, the child would own the parent by bawling for hours and killing the mood of everyone. Would you believe that, as a parent, you can actually control the situation as long as you are consistent with the discipline?

Also, it would stretch the child as a hyperactive, adding more problems to the parent.

I still believe that a parent should control the child. Just last month, I experienced something amusing at the airport. So, there was this sosyalera mom who had with her two kids, around seven to eight in age. I overheard her telling the kids that she needs to buy food and she left her bag with the kids. Imagine, two boys in a public place without their parent. And they just sat there. They were not noisy or boisterous. They just waited for their mom.

There is no such thing as tough love. You, as a parent, owe everything to this society and to God. If your lame excuse is to just say that the pregnancy was unwanted then at that point, you are actually starting a bad recurring habit, if that is the best reason that you can think of, that would last your lifetime. And saying no to your child would not mean that you are a bad parent. In fact, you are teaching them the basic principles of life.

If you do not want another palamunin in your life, better stop having sex. Or at least wear a rubber.

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~ by targrod on May 8, 2012.

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