:: Top11: Almost died ::


We almost had an accident at home last weekend. Gas hose was punctured by some unknown object (probably rats or aliens from Maria Makiling’s army). Since my mom was cooking at that time, gas burned (obviously) and it caused fire as high as a foot or two. I shouted hysterically (in a cool way, of course), hoping that someone nearer to the gas tank would close the valve and turn it off.

Thank God no one was hurt.

Fear set in and I thought to myself after: if I die, what should have been the things that people should not discover and what are the things that I could do, if I want to freak people out.

Also, I am already used to the subject of death. I find no morbidity in this.

11 Things. I should do to avoid any problems if I was killed all of a sudden (or what can I still do if I’m already dead).

1. Throw ALL porn. (Not that I have any of ’em, this is just hypothetical. Seriously, you have to believe me. I am telling the truth; honest to goodness, with all my heart and hope to die. Also, they say that the longer the explanation, the guiltier the person. Not me, nah-uh. I am really innocent. Pramis.)

2. I’ll take a month-worth unpaid vacation leave and I’ll watch the remaining 400 films from the 1001 Movies You Must See Before You Die list.

3. Ang itapon lahat ng mga lumang underwear at bumili ng mga bago. Syempre, sa panahon ngayon, we are what we wear. Iba pa rin ang impact pag ang embalmer nagsabi na, “Mabuti pa dito kay kuya, bago ang brip bago mamatay. Yung isa, beykon brip na! Yakers.”

4. To schedule monthly blog posts and tell people, that heaven (or hell) is treating me well.

5. Ang tumayo sa roof deck ng isang six-story building at sumigaw ng “Bubutsi! Dao Ming Sooooo!! Bubutsi!!!” with matching red balloons. At may background music na Ni Hao De Ai ni Penny Tai.

6. It is going to be the death of me but I’ll be brave. I’ll watch an episode of Willie Revillame’s variety show in Channel 5, live.

7. Post cam-whore videos of me crying like a baby while watching films that made / makes me cry.

8. ‘organ’ donor. For transplants. Not explaining.

9. To remove all shirtless profile pictures in any networking / microblogging sites. I should start uploading images of these, noh?

10. To shit in the comfort room of any Starbucks outlet.

11. A big tattoo of Ruffa Gutierrez and Annabelle Rama, at the back. Because I need the distinction, in case my face gets burnt and all.


~ by targrod on June 28, 2012.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )


Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: